The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
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