what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra