I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Randomize
