i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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