Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize