So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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