therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
