There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
