If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
