Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I wish I only lived at night.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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