Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
