apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
party gras won. party gras always wins.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Randomize