The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
