There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize