Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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