Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize