Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize