Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
