I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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