My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize