why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize