Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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