I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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