dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
