"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Someone signed my nipple.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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