he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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