So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
