i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Randomize
