I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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