David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
