Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
