Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
