you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
