i don't like sucking hair
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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