If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
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