He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
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