it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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