I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
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