I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
