Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Sex in the backyard? Check.
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