Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.