I must be too annoying 4 u.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
this hospital has no fireball
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
