Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
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