Don't EVER smell your tampon
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.