My nipple is on Facebook.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Randomize