In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Randomize
