Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?

(313): View more from Michigan

Ya

(586): View more from Michigan

I used to kick so much ass

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(586): Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part? (313): Ya (586): I used to kick so much ass http://tfl.nu/d78f

Replies (2) Good night (1679) Bad night (692)
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(248): View more from Michigan

im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me

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(248): im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me http://tfl.nu/nrzq

Replies (10) Good night (1258) Bad night (578)
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(503): View more from Oregon

bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.

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(503): bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it. http://tfl.nu/wqus

Replies (20) Good night (4497) Bad night (718)
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(513): View more from Ohio

I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.

(419): View more from Ohio

I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.

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(513): I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth. (419): I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat. http://tfl.nu/rzvc

Replies (10) Good night (2982) Bad night (635)
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(252): View more from North Carolina

I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck

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(252): I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck http://tfl.nu/v85x

Replies (15) Good night (2422) Bad night (705)
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(602): View more from Arizona

dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.

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(602): dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese. http://tfl.nu/mk7p

Replies (30) Good night (4426) Bad night (1115)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.

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(215): distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard. http://tfl.nu/840x

Replies (36) Good night (4316) Bad night (1890)
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(239): View more from Florida

When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.

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(239): When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up. http://tfl.nu/gf96

Replies (19) Good night (6142) Bad night (896)
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(630): View more from Illinois

you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing

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(630): you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing http://tfl.nu/mpy9

Replies (6) Good night (2971) Bad night (859)
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(248): View more from Michigan

he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.

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(248): he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg. http://tfl.nu/hgt4

Replies (24) Good night (1311) Bad night (5067)
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(847): View more from Illinois

I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best

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(847): I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best http://tfl.nu/7i53

Replies (7) Good night (2130) Bad night (1336)
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(407): View more from Florida

And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."

(407): View more from Florida

That's called being sensitive.

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(407): And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now." (407): That's called being sensitive. http://tfl.nu/l8tt

Replies (6) Good night (1991) Bad night (745)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.

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(617): So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan. http://tfl.nu/ggx4

Replies (11) Good night (1562) Bad night (590)
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(707): View more from California

Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa

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(707): Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa http://tfl.nu/616r

Replies (1) Good night (531) Bad night (321)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick

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(+44): Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick http://tfl.nu/8ik3

Replies (5) Good night (800) Bad night (417)

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