I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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