whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
