These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
